Rome Is Burning
If Germans had known what was coming, how would they have spent their last weeks? Asking for a friend.
The state of our nation is troubling. I’m not even sure how to word my way through this, to be honest. I live in a big city; they’ve already brought in the National Guard. We’re wayyy too close to boogaloo boi territory here in Utah.
I’m not one for conspiracy theories (Nikola Tesla’s death aside) but it’s hard to not see the brewing of a Perfect Storm just off the horizon.
40 million out of work
Deadly contagious virus
Inept leadership
A president who incites violence
Alt-left groups itching for a civil war
Militarized police
And let’s not forget Murder Hornets (I jest because if I can’t laugh I’d curl up in a ball and sob.)
Civilizations fall. That’s what they do. I wish we could learn from our mistakes and make small adjustments along the way. We’re not evolved enough as a species, it seems.
I write to make sense of things. I do it in my personal life. It’s a critical part of my self-care. It is how I start my best days. I don’t know how to write my way through this. I am reading Brené Brown’s Braving the Wilderness (again). She talks about getting close, about leaning in, about being vulnerable and connecting and seeing each other. I am trying, sis. I. AM. TRYING.
My M.O. is cut-and-run, burn-the-bridge, never-look-back (Virgo). I don’t know how well it’s served me. I’m doing my best to look deep into the heart of the fear and stop doing the things that don’t help me grow, but right now is challenging the fuck out of me. I judge. Harshly. I have no qualms about cutting people right out of my life and moving on. I don’t miss the ones I’ve lost, I barely mourn their loss. Perhaps that’s bad. I’m still growing. But right now, I gotta be honest, if you can’t admit we’re in a shit show, we’re not going to make it as friends. If you can’t figure out how to use your voice to say “Not On My Watch,” I can’t allow you into my circle and I’m going to ask you to leave (or hit the airlock). My circle is tightening; there’s no room for cancer cells, not even one.
Yeah, yeah, that gives me an echo chamber and doesn’t allow for differing points of view, but I’m not strong enough for that right now. There are other teachers far better than me who get to educate (see my WTF post as proof).
This post was for me; thanks for the indulgence. I hope you’re safe. I hope you’re taking care of yourself.
Be kind.
Be prepared.
Buy crypto.
